Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Real People in Love: Real People

Hello my lovelies. This week's Real People in Love is going to be a little different.

Following last week's Real People in Love I got the following email from the darling Alexa from Afternoons & Coffeespoons:

I just wanted to thank you for making me smile with every Real People in Love post. I am 23 and navigating the dating world (and hating it!) and every time I read one of your love posts, I feel a renewed hope. I know, I know--I'm young and it will come, but it's easy to feel frustrated and wonder if I will ever find someone to love and to love me back like the stories I read. So thank you for the inspiration!:)

So often as I read the responses for Real People in Love I think that they are directed specifically at me, a newlywed living a happy life who has figured out how her relationship works but is always striving to make her marriage better.

Alexa's email reminded me of the life I lived not too long ago.

Single, trying to figure out what I wanted to do, where I wanted to go and who I wanted to be.

I've been with Jus for pretty much my entire adult life (we started dating when I was 21 and had just finished my last semester as a full time student) so I think a lot of times I forget about the girl I was, with hopes, dreams & fears.

I've always been an eternal optimist and a romantic on top of that so I spent a good amount of time dreaming of the man that would swoop in and sweep me off my feet. But the reality of my life was that while my roommates went on dates and had boyfriends I was perpetually single.

For the most part I enjoyed playing the role of the single girl but I would occasionally get down about being single. I tried to stay positive and focus on the other love in my life but there were times I would wonder when is it going to happen.

When love walked into my life was precisely at the moment I wasn't expecting it and precisely the person I didn't expect. But it walked in all the same and now I have Jus to keep me company, snuggle me when I'm sad and dream about what our life will be like.

I'm not sure if I meant this post to be inspirational or just a reminder to all of us old, married gals, of how lucky we are to have found our one, settled down and started the lives we dreamed of all those years ago.


Krysten @ After 'I Do' said...

I hated being single. I started online dating in high school.... way too early for online dating in my opinion.

All my friends found love right off the bat (at least that's what it felt like) and I hated that I had guys in my life but not ones that seemed to want to settle down.

Dustin and I met when I was 20 going on 21 and got together when I was 21 going on 22. And it just fit. It was one of those things where I just knew I'd found who I was looking for.

He popped up when I wasn't really looking. I was hung up on an ex and he was hung up on an ex. It took us a year to come to the realization that we deserved better people... each other. Sometimes the waiting isn't fun but when you finally find that someone it's awesome.

Suburban Sweetheart said...

I'm 26, & I moved across the country & in with my boyfriend two months ago. We've only been together 10 months, so it was quite a leap. But you know what? I hadn't dated anyone in four years before him. I'd gone on crappy dates, I'd had some mediocre sex, I'd had unreciprocated crushes on coworkers & friends of friends, but nothing panned out. I knew - somehow just knew - that something was coming for me, & that when it did, I wouldn't need anything else.

And here I am. It took awhile, but here WE are. I don't think I could ever forget what it feels like to be single & hopeful - in so many ways, even in love, I feel like the perpetually single & hopeful girl. It feels like a part of my genetic makeup at this point. But it just makes me more thankful to have found someone to love.

Amy said...

Great post.

Since I'm totally in limbo right now, between trying to reconcile the relationship with the most important person in the world to me, and stuck kind of in single world. These stories definitely give me hope.

I know my relationship was/is real and that right now I'm in a hiccup, something necessary but extremely hard at the same time.

Real Love stories definitely help everyone appreciate what they have, look forward to the future and give hope to pretty much anyone (single/relationship/married/separated/divorced)

Hannah said...

Beautifully put. I met Pete right after a semester in Tanzania (and a wreckless romance with a French boy). I had sworn off boys and had big plans to travel the world.

I love your Real People in Love posts. If you every want a slightly cooky totally in love couple - we'd be up for the challenge!

ErinMSW said...

Wonderful post. I also met Matt when I had given up. I was 25, sick of dating, and had just ended a completely toxic "relationship" with a guy who'd treated me like shit for 4 years. I was SO OVER love and men and had every intention of just taking a break from it all. But Matt entered my world and that all changed. And it took a long time and a lot of drama for us to get to where we are, but I had a hunch about us so I was patient. 6 years after we met and 5 years after we "officially" started dating, we became husband and wife.

I will never forget how hard it was to be single. And I look at my single girlfriends and am so thankful I was lucky enough to find Matt. I am always happy to share our story because I hope it gives someone out there hope.

steph c said...

I love this, thanks for posting it :) I found Scot at pretty much the same time/way as you found Jus.. wasn't looking for it or expecting it. It found me. I strongly believe that things happen when you least expect them.

Kennedy said...

this feature is amazing, and you're post really touched me. ive got a great dude myself and its true i totally forget how it was before i met him.

Julie {love, julie} said...

this is a fantastic post! I met Mitchell when I was 19 (and now we just got engaged!!) so when I think about back when i was single it feels like a different life!

I love your real people in love posts every week, so fun to read!

Kate said...

Such a good reminder and so so true.